Long Wang Threatens Japan

12:20 AM -- Tropical Cyclone Longwang is approaching the coast of Japan.
Your puerile joke here.
— Larry, Attack Monkey, Light Reading
Your puerile joke here.
— Larry, Attack Monkey, Light Reading
6:00 AM America's worst food begins a long, profitable march across Russia
4:00 PM Larry the Attack Monkey wishes you a carnage-free holiday season
5:15 PM Freedom from marketing abuse, that is
9:10 AM Step away from the stuffed animal...
9:45 AM The slop-bucket list