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Rubber-Band Man

Red Panda
Red Panda
Red Panda

12:45 PM -- Yahoo! News reports on a man we can legitimately call the guy with the most time on his hands of anyone, ever:

    Steve Milton, through concentration and perseverance, has created a 3,300-pound ball comprised of rubber bands. His creation measures almost 5 feet tall and takes up half his two-car garage.

A 3,300-pound ball? Doesn't this guy know there are less fortunate people out there who are suffering from band shortage? Sometimes paperclips just don't suffice!

The story continues:

    Milton, who wants to stretch the ball at least another 1,000 pounds, said the work isn't all that safe. Milton is careful to keep the ball contained with blocks of wood so it doesn't roll away. He wears gloves to avoid burning his hands from friction and learned to move when a band breaks.

    "If they snap they come off pretty fast," he said. "They've given me welts before."

Poor baby...

I'd say it's a tossup between this guy who gets welts from his own gigantic band-ball and the guy who thought it best to hug a panda for the Moron of the Year award.

— Red Panda, Collects Lint, Light Reading

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12/5/2012 | 3:36:32 AM
re: Rubber-Band Man
What would drive somebody to do this? Job loss or divorce, maybe?

This reminds me of a high school classmate who was completely unable to deal with the competition in college. So, instead of going to classes, he simply played pool in the dorm basement for an entire semester, until he finally got kicked out.
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