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Pizzology

4:00 PM -- One Riki Markowitz perkily chirps on the MSNBC Dating & Personals site:

    Think a candlelit dinner is the best venue to suss out a date’s potential? Well, a new study claims that ordering a good ol’ pizza pie can be much more telling. “Pizza-eaters’ favorite toppings show a correlation to their behavior,” says Alan Hirsch, M.D., lead researcher and director of the Smell & Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago. Commissioned by Domino’s Pizza, the study polled 1,000 people between the ages of 18 to 59 about their pizza-eating preferences and behavioral characteristics. Read the findings below to find out what certain toppings say about you, your date, and your future together.

    If your date orders one meat topping… People who order just pepperoni or sausage on their pie are generally irritable, prone to procrastination, and they often “forget” obligations (like that weekend getaway he or she promised to take with you in the spring)...
And blablablah... Here's a more useful bit of advice:

If your date suggests Domino's Pizza, run -- do not walk -- run in the opposite direction.

— Larry, Attack Monkey, Light Reading

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