Squirrels on Crack!

4:20 PM -- Hard to gauge the reality factor on this one, but according to multiple sources, crack-addicted squirrels are roaming the streets of South London.

Apparently, a recent police crackdown on crackdens has crackheads burying crack in their crackyards (if not their buttcracks) – and cute little crackrodents are going about digging it up, and, well, going nuts over it (sorry).

According to the chilling account of "one fearful resident":

Well, yes, that does seem a strange thing to say. On the other hand, who knows what kind of look that squirrel had in its bloodshot eyes?


A squirrel who knows what he's looking for.

— Red CrackPanda, Light Reading