& cplSiteName &

Beware!

Column
Column
Column
10/30/2003
50%
50%

Hist whist, little ghost things!

It’s that special time of year again: the season of ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggedy beasties, and things that go bump! in the night!

As it happens, quite a few truly scaaaaaaaaaary things have been going bump! in our in-box of late. And some of them, frankly, are beginning to smell. So, in the spirit of Trick or Treat, we hereby pass some of the fouler specimens along to you. But beware, my monkettes! A hearty beverage should be taken with what follows...

  • First off: the good news. CPqD (wasn't that one o'them robots in Star Wars?) was looking to lure us to USTA Telecom03 in Las Vegas thusly: “Play golf. Have fun. Network with telecom leaders. Win a hummer!”

    Well. Screw golf, and I can forbear the rollicking good times with the "telecom leaders," but a free hummer? Heck, it suits my agenda! I never leave Vegas without getting myself a good hummer or two!

  • Speaking of bacchanalian romps: “Lucent Technologies will host a Brown Bag eLunch teleconference on Friday, October 31… The Brown Bag eLunch is a series of informational webcasts designed to highlight Lucent's latest strategies, solutions, products and technologiezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

    Hold me back, mama! Them Lucites may have some money problems, but they still know how to show a monkey a good time. I’m strappin’ on the e-bag even as we speak!

  • From the Marketing Mayhem League: Alan Kipping says his firm, Sevista, can help us with our "subscription stimulation." Sorry Al, but you sounded just a bit too eager – plus, as we've found to our considerable chagrin, "subscription stimulation" happens to be illegal in at least seven states.

  • Here’s a frightening manifesto from across the puddle: Paris Europlace is hosting a conference dedicated to ”European Enlargement and Integration.” Watch yer back, Mongolia! The Lebensraum hunt is on again!

  • Speaking of puddles: A moist Adelphia spokesbod alerts us to a change of plans (and knickers, apparently): “Hi Mary – My apologies for the incontinence...” Hey, no prob! But no piggy-back rides for you... and don’t call me Mary!

  • From the Dept. of Acroterror: "Phapps (an acronym for phone applications) is both a new medium and a new creative message platform that turns the average mobile phone into an interactive informational, advertising or e-Commerce medium today..." So writes Fern Flamberg (or is that Phern Phlamberg?) from the Empty Blather Division of DeviceIQ. Thanks, Fern, but we'll stick with Phone Articulations for now.

  • More from the Eastern Front: “Sagem is a French high tech multinational with offices in over twenty countries and production facilities in Germany, Brazil, Spain, US and the Check Republic.” Rumor has it they’re looking to expand into the Credit Union and, perhaps, the Sultanate of Simoleons as well.

  • And finally, this memo from the folk at Evite. No, not that Argentine babe – Evite’s the electronic greeting card company, holidays their specialty. We reproduce it in full:

      Dear Evite Newsletter Subscriber,

      Yesterday we mailed a newsletter to our subscribers with incorrect dates for three important Holidays. Please accept our sincerest apologies for these errors and note the following corrections:

      Labor Day, September 1st
      Rosh Hashanah, September 27th
      Yom Kippur, October 6th

      In addition, we also wish to apologize for having listed Yom Kippur as one of our "Reasons To Party". We understand and respect that Yom Kippur is a Day of Atonement, a day to be taken seriously to reflect and fast, and as such, one of the most important Jewish Holidays in the year.

      Again we deeply apologize for the error and thank you for allowing us to make this correction.

      Very Best,
      The Evite Team
    Party on, penitents! And Christmas has been moved to the 11th this year! So Happy Halloween, my primate pals! And remember...

      whisk look out for the old woman
      with the wart on her nose
      what she'll do to yer
      nobody knows
    But it could be a hummer!

    — Larry, Monkey, Light Reading

    (0)  | 
    Comment  | 
    Print  | 
  • Newest First  |  Oldest First  |  Threaded View        ADD A COMMENT
    Educational Resources
    sponsor supplied content
    Educational Resources Archive
    More Blogs from Column
    Spectrum sharing is becoming a bigger issue as the 5G radio specification evolves.
    Addressing current and future app demands while laying the foundation for mobile's next big network transition.
    Broadcasters can no longer rely on pulling audiences to the TV screen; they need to pursue their audiences on digital, wherever they are.
    Why advanced data analytics are the future for streaming video services.
    5G could ride the traditional wireless hype cycle, or – quite possibly – break the chain, suggests Nokia's North American CTO.
    From The Founder
    Light Reading today starts a new voyage as part of a larger Enterprise.
    Flash Poll
    Live Streaming Video
    Charting the CSP's Future
    Six different communications service providers join to debate their visions of the future CSP, following a landmark presentation from AT&T on its massive virtualization efforts and a look back on where the telecom industry has been and where it's going from two industry veterans.
    LRTV Interviews
    ETSI's CTO Talks NFV, 5G & NGP

    12|5|16   |   09:45   |   (0) comments


    Adrian Scrase, CTO at standards body ETSI, talks about the various initiatives and specifications developments related to NFV, 5G and NGP (next-generation protocols) that will underpin next-gen networks.
    Women in Comms Introduction Videos
    Korn Ferry Consultant: How to Find, Cultivate & Be the Best Talent

    11|30|16   |   4:10   |   (1) comment


    Erin Callaghan, a managing consultant for Korn Ferry Futurestep, shares strategies for companies to improve how they recruit and for women to ensure they don't get lost in the pipeline.
    LRTV Custom TV
    We Can Make the World More Sustainable

    11|29|16   |     |   (0) comments


    GeSI is a global e-Sustainability Initiative organization bringing together 40 big multinational companies around the world. According to GeSI's report, information and communication technology can make the world more sustainable. Luis Neves, chairman of GeSI, shared with us his opinion at Ultra-broadband Forum (UBBF2016).
    LRTV Custom TV
    Finding a New Way to Engage Customers & Drive Revenue

    11|29|16   |     |   (0) comments


    Mobile revenues are declining. Digicel, a player in the Caribbean telecommunications/entertainment space, has found a new way to engage customers and drive revenue. John Quinn, CTO of Digicel, shared with us its story at Ultra-broadband Forum (UBBF2016)
    LRTV Custom TV
    Do You Really Need Gigabit Infrastructure?

    11|29|16   |     |   (0) comments


    Altibox is the biggest fiber-to-the-home (FTTH) player and the largest provider of video and TV in Norway. They started out with zero customers in 2002. Now they have close to half a million households and companies attached to their FTTH business. Nils Arne, CEO of Altibox shared with us their story and insight on 5G at Ultra-broadband Forum (UBBF2016).
    LRTV Custom TV
    BTís Openreach Strategy & Its Updates in 2016

    11|29|16   |     |   (0) comments


    A lot of developments at Openreach this year in terms of strategy and planned investments. Peter Bell, CIO of Openreach BT, shared with us the updates of Openreach at Ultra-broadband Forum (UBBF2016).
    LRTV Custom TV
    ITU: The Broadband Is Our Future

    11|29|16   |     |   (0) comments


    At Ultra-broadband Forum, Houlin Zhao, Secretary General of ITU, discussed how important it is for countries, companies and everybody to be working together to help to build the broadband and digital economies (UBBF2016).
    LRTV Custom TV
    Tackling 5G in Dallas

    11|28|16   |     |   (0) comments


    Here are our highlights of the 5G North America show in Dallas, Texas with Light Reading's Dan Jones.
    LRTV Interviews
    Cox Prepping for Virtualization Trials

    11|14|16   |     |   (0) comments


    In this video interview, Cox's Jeff Finkelstein discusses MSO's plans to test managed business services in early 2017 and tackle Distributed Access Architectures.
    LRTV Custom TV
    Drivers & Potential of NGP

    11|11|16   |     |   (0) comments


    ETSI has created an Industry Specification Group to work on Next Generation Protocols (NGP ISG), looking at evolving communications and networking protocols to provide the scale, security, mobility and ease of deployment required for the connected society of the 21st century. The NGP ISG will identify the requirements for next generation protocols and network ...
    LRTV Custom TV
    Huawei IP 2020 for Future Networks

    11|11|16   |     |   (0) comments


    Future Networks should satisfy many requirements such as high throughput, extremely low latency, flexible mobility, intrinsic security, networking automation, and so forth. The Chief Architect of Huawei Future Networks addresses a holistic solution, i.e., IP 2020, to achieve these requirements for various future life scenarios (e.g., autonomous driving, tactile ...
    LRTV Custom TV
    Digital Object Architecture

    11|11|16   |     |   (0) comments


    Digital Object Architecture provides a basic information infrastructure that can facilitate interoperability between or among different systems, processes, and other information resources, including different identity management systems. Digital objects are networked objects that are named by digital object identifiers and instantiated by an infrastructure service ...
    Upcoming Live Events
    December 6-8, 2016, The Westin Excelsior, Rome
    May 16-17, 2017, Austin Convention Center, Austin, TX
    All Upcoming Live Events
    Infographics
    Hot Topics
    Cable Nodes Becoming a Choke Point
    Brian Santo, Senior editor, Test & Measurement / Components, Light Reading, 12/5/2016
    Apple Seeds 5G? Seeks 'Multi-Gigabit' Chip Designer
    Dan Jones, Mobile Editor, 11/30/2016
    Altice Plans FTTH for Entire US Footprint
    Iain Morris, News Editor, 11/30/2016
    Altice FTTH Bill Could Hit Almost $9.6B in US
    Iain Morris, News Editor, 12/1/2016
    Like Us on Facebook
    Twitter Feed
    BETWEEN THE CEOs - Executive Interviews
    Eyal Waldman, CEO of Mellanox Technologies, speaks to Steve Saunders, CEO of Light Reading, for an exclusive interview about the 100 GB cable challenge, cybersecurity and much more.
    Join us for an in-depth interview between Steve Saunders of Light Reading and Alexis Black Bjorlin of Intel as they discuss the release of the company's Silicon Photonics platform, its performance, long-term prospects, customer expectations and much more.
    Animals with Phones
    Live Digital Audio

    Even when there's a strong pipeline of female talent in the comms industry, it tends to leak all the way to the top. McKinsey & Company says women experience pipeline leakage at three primary points: being unable to enter, being stuck in the middle or being locked out of the top. Each pipeline pain point presents its own challenges, but also opportunities to stop the leak. Wireless operator Sprint is making a conscious effort to improve its own pipeline from new recruits to the C-suite, and it wants the rest of the industry to do the same. In this Women in Comms radio show, WiC Board Member and Sprint Vice President of Enterprise Sales Nelly Pitocco will give us her take on the industry's pipeline challenges. Pitocco, who joined Sprint in May and has spent 20 years in the comms industry, will also offer solutions, share how Sprint is tackling the challenge within its own organization and take your questions live on air.