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Sugar Buzz-Kill

4:50 PM -- In the same week that New York Governor Eliot Spitzer stepped down, yet another respected public official fell from grace, the Associated Press noted in an alarming report from a New Haven, Conn., middle school:

    Michael Sheridan was stripped of his title as class vice president, barred from attending an honors student dinner and suspended for a day after buying a bag of Skittles from a classmate.

Taste the rainbow? Taste the humiliation, Sheridan.

    The New Haven school system banned candy sales in 2003 as part of a districtwide school wellness policy, said school spokeswoman Catherine Sullivan-DeCarlo.

    Superintendent Reginald Mayo said Wednesday that Sheridan Middle School principal Eleanor Turner just wanted to keep students safe.

Good, because everyone knows Skittles are a gateway candy. Eat one bag, and next thing you know you're all hopped up on Pixie Sticks.

    [Michael Sheridan] said he didn't realize his candy purchase was against the rules, but he did notice that the student selling the Skittles on Feb. 26 was being secretive.

    An administrator busted Michael with the candy in his pocket. His mother says the student who sold him the Skittles out of a lunch box was also suspended.

The kid also had rows of Hershey Bars inside his jacket, and the trunk of his mom's minivan was full of knock-off Jujubes.

Luckily for Michael, this story has a happy ending. We can only hope that he'll get his life back on track.

— Red Panda, Light Reading

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