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Ms. LAN Is Drunk

3:00 PM -- There's nothing more entertaining than the "creative" PR pitch. Witness this one from this morning's mail dump:
MAN (Sidling up to a LAN in a sexy black dress drinking a martini): So, how are you enjoying the show?

LAN: It's not bad. How about yourself? Getting anything good out of this year's crop of vendors?

MAN: Why, yes, actually. You know about Ethernet, right? (trying not to be too condescending but coming off like that anyway)

LAN (blushing trying to decide how to put this guy in his place without turning him off): Why, actually, I've had Ethernet for decades, really, but I guess MANs have been deprived.

MAN: Yes, I must confess that Ethernet is fairly new to us. LANs have had the privilege of having just one kind of homogeneous architecture ready for Ethernet from their creation. We MAN, well, let's just say all our facilities aren't quite ready for Ethernet. Also, in the past, after we got Ethernet, once we mated with our LAN of choice, things could get a bit ugly lot of fights about who's at fault and where the problems lie you know (whispering) demarcation.

LAN: (Gasp!) Oh yes, I forgot about all of that you poor dear (leaning in to look sympathetic)

MAN: Yes, this used to get me depressed until now. This company called [VENDOR NAME OMITTED] is going to help me get Ethernet and make my boss, Mr. Carrier, a lot happier. Also, I'll be able to happily mate with any LAN who's got Ethernet, as well. We'll be able to tell who's fault it is when something goes wrong, and I can help even more by telling exactly where the problem is in the network. That is, if she'll let me.

LAN: Wow. That sounds pretty spectacular.

MAN: Well, it's a start. Now I've just got to find the right LAN to make a connection. (Pause) Can I buy you another drink?

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And there you have it -- no longer a great divide between the MAN and the LAN when it comes to Ethernet. It's a match made in heaven when you've got [VENDOR NAME OMITTED] to help. If you'd like to talk with those little matchmakers about how they help Mr. Carrier deploy and effectively manage Ethernet services over any facility and offer a true demarcation point for easier customer management, just let me know. We can set up an interview or offer a contributed article on the subject. We're here to help you however we can.

Thanks for tuning in. Next year, see how Mr. PDA keeps from getting his boss all exposed.

Words fail me...

— Phil Harvey, News Editor, Light Reading

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