Class Trip to the VZW Store
5:59 PM -- My two year cellphone contract with Verizon Wireless is almost up which means it's time for me to finally get a new phone. This is a wonderful thing since the last two years of my life were nearly ruined by a device known as the Motorola RAZR. I hate everything about this phone. I hate the slow menus, I hate the 20 minute battery life, and I hate that it drops more calls than my older phone did. Furthermore, I am convinced that it hates me back. When I (drunkenly) leave my cellphone unattended somewhere, I pray to God that someone steals it.
So in observance of my impending freedom, Light Reading Events Assistant Christine Cascio, Red Panda, and I took a little day trip to the Verizon Wireless store during lunch today to examine some new devices.
Our first stop was a complete failure. Red Panda had led the way to what actually was an authorized Verizon Wireless re-seller. In other words, the store was likely a front for some shady operation going on in the basement. (Granted, selling cellphones is a shady operation itself.)
"Fear not," said Cascio. "I know where the real store is." Red Panda and I would quickly learn that Cascio was lying. She had no idea where the store was. We wandered up Broadway for nearly 20 minutes listening to Cascio proclaim that the store was on the next block. It was not.
Eventually, we reached the light at the end of the tunnel (or was it an oncoming train?) and were inside an actual bona fide Verizon Wireless store. There I quickly became angered when I discovered that the old "New Every Two" plan that for years had entitled me to a $100 credit toward the purchase of a new phone had actually turned into a $50 credit. "This cannot be," I said. "I've been doing this for years. I've been a customer since the Bell Atlantic days." But the salesman wouldn't budge. The terms of the deal had changed, and Verizon can change the agreement you signed years ago whenever they please.
I tried arguing with him further while Red Panda gnawed on his ankles, but he simply wouldn't give. Furthermore, the selection of available phones was depressing. The new Samsung Juke seemed pretty cool, but alas, I'm not 16 anymore. I'm tempted to get the Motorola Sliver, but since it looks like the evil fraternal twin of the RAZR, I'm terrified of it.
What to do...
— Raymond McConville, Reporter, Light Reading