Edinburgh-born [food critic A.A.] Gill described Scotland as "unquestionably the worst country in Europe to eat out in - or the worst country that didn't once have a communist dictator".
Gill added: "This place is hotching [sic] with some of the best raw ingredients in the world, yet finding a scallop on a menu is like trying to go dogging in Riyadh.
"Scots die younger not just because of the cholesterol, but, in the end, because they can't face another dinner."
Must have eaten a bad leek.
[Ed. note: "Hotching" apparently means "swarming." No idea what "dogging in Riyadh" might mean, though it sounds unpleasant.]
— Red Panda, Gastronome, Light Reading