A Macedonian court convicted a bear of theft and damage for stealing honey from a beekeeper who fought off the attacks with thumping "turbo-folk" music.
Warrants for the arrest of Winnie the Pooh and Yogi Bear have been issued. A Mr. C. Robin has provided valuable testimony in the case.
"I tried to distract the bear with lights and music because I heard bears are afraid of that," Zoran Kiseloski told top-selling daily Dnevnik after the yearlong case of the bear versus the beekeeper ended in the beekeeper's favour.
Clearly this was just a rumor.
"So I bought a generator, lit up the area and put on songs of (Serbian "turbo-folk" star) Ceca."
The bear stayed away for a few weeks, but came back when the generator ran out of power and the music fell silent...
There was no information on the whereabouts of the bear.
— Red Panda, Technically Not a Bear, Light Reading