9:00 AM -- I was the first person on my block to ban Web 2.0, and I did so within days of my employer's parent company securing ownership of that very term's trademark.

It is this sense of incredibly bad timing that prevents me from pursuing my lifelong ambition as the world's only gambling, stand-up comic weatherman.

But is it so odd that CMP owns Web 2.0? Take a spin around the patent and trademark databases, and you'll find that the maker of Hot Wheels redefines "Paradigm Shift" and someone affiliated with ESPN once loved appointing a "Geek of the Week."

Table 1: Webby Words

Now for the Web 2.0 question on everyone's mind: Will there be more versions of the Web?

I don't know. But Web 4.0 is still up for grabs as a trademark, should someone want to fire up a conference series. (Wherever he is, Jeff Pulver's ears are twitching.) Of course, trademark databases aren't the only place where folks toss around such deliciously empty descriptors:

In a June 2006 press release from IDG World Expo, Web 3.0 arrives:

A Dec. 16, 2006 Pittsburgh Post-Gazette column fast forwards beyond Web 3.0:

Why stop there? In a June 2006 column from the Guardian newspaper, the title of the article asks: "Should I trademark the term Web 3.0?" The answer:

Had enough yet? What about self-described "agent of change" Seth Godin's Web4? Here's a snippet of his January 2007 post:

Seth used to work for a living, but I think now he gets paid to talk about himself, which explains this description of his latest book:

Please. Make it stop.

— Phil Harvey, Person of the Year, Light Reading