NOON -- Big news -- very big news -- of the epoch: "Obesity has been called an "EPIDEMIC" [emphasis added] by the World Health Organization."
EVERYBODY PANIC! (Hope you can fit through the emergency exit.) But first, here are some supporting stats you may want to take with a grain of salt. Or, better, with a burger and fries...
More than 1.2 billion people in the world are now officially classified as overweight, according to the World Health Organization (WHO).
Nearly one out of five people worldwide is a lardass. One out of five. The other four live in Somalia.
Contributing to more than 17 million deaths every year, obesity and overweight are feared to increase from the over 1 billion people affected worldwide today to 1.5 billion by 2015.
Once considered a problem only in wealthy countries, they are now rising dramatically in low- and middle-income countries…
According to WHO estimates, more than 75 per cent of women over the age of 30 are now overweight in countries as diverse as Barbados, Egypt, Malta, Mexico, South Africa, Turkey, and the United States. Estimates are similar for men, with over 75 per cent now overweight in, for example, Argentina, Germany, Greece, Kuwait, New Zealand, Samoa, and the United Kingdom.
Three quarters of Egyptian women and Argentine men are fatties. We knew about Samoans.
The latest data from the National Center for Health Statistics show that 30 percent of U.S. adults 20 years of age and older—over 60 million people—are obese.
Sixty million: More than one out of five Americans is, not just fat, but obese, and one out of three adults. One out of three. Now, please, look around you. Even taking Kansas into account, could anyone seriously believe this?
The most recent figures from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention show that 65 percent of U.S. adults — or about 129.6 million people — are either overweight or obese. In addition to decreasing quality of life and increasing the risk of premature death, obesity and overweight cost the Nation an estimated $117 billion in direct medical costs and indirect costs such as lost wages due to illness.
So two out of three of us need the StairMaster®. By the way, that $117 billion figure, pulled out of someone's fat fundament, is the price tag du jour...
Last year, the Surgeon General's Call to Action on Obesity suggested that obesity and its complications were already costing the nation $117 billion annually.
But there's hopeful news for smokers...
"Obesity is catching up to tobacco as the leading cause of death in America. If this trend continues it will soon overtake tobacco," said Julie L. Gerberding, director of the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Great. Let's ban fat people from restaurants. But first, more reasoned discourse from Ms Gerberding...
"There's a PANDEMIC OF OBESITY we are experiencing in this country," said Gerberding. "If you looked at any epidemic—whether it's INFLUENZA or PLAGUE from the Middle Ages—they are not as serious as the epidemic of obesity in terms of the health impact on our country and our society." [emphases added] [source]
Panic: an unsurpassed weight-loss technique.
— Larry, Pleasingly Plump Monkey, Light Reading